First of all, I wanna say thanks to Sherlynn for being there with me when everything is over. Thank sister (: Although it's all over now but ... Seriously, he's still in my mind. I just can't get him off my mind yet. Actually all along, I know that I'm just a replacement of her. But I just kept everything to myself. As I believe that I could help him to forget about her slowly. But it seems like I'm wrong. He had been dreaming & having flashback about her every night. I know nothing at all as he choose to keep everything to himself. That's what I dislike about him ): He don't want to walked out from his previous r/s so no matter what I did also no use. I had done my part as a girlfriend. I really don't know what else can I do. If I really want to betray him, I won't agree to be with him in the first place. Cause I know the consequences of betraying him. &i know the feelings of being betray by someone you love. There'll be retribution so NEVER EVER betray someone you love/love you.
Here's the conversation between me & him for yesterday (: me: hmmm .. Are you my boyfriend? him: you say yes den yes, no den no. Cos i dunno how to trust in r/s him: Think the who is woo u wat. me: NO! All along, he's woo-ing after caijing. I'm NOT his target. I already told you alot of times. why you just can't believe me? him: Cos this is wat happen to my last r/s totally the same me: But he's really not going after me, i swear. Is this the one which cause you dono how to trust in r/s? him: i dunno me: But seriously, he's NOT woo-ing me & he's not the type of guy I like. I want no others except you. Seriously, I want our r/s to last. I believe we can do it. him: (no reply) me: Hmmm .. You willing to give both of us a chance to try it out? I know you sure have fear from the previous r/s but you have to walked out from it. If not, no matter what I do also won't change anything. Seriously, do you treat me as your girlfriend? him: Walk out? How to things so similar how to? me: What I mean is .. You got to walked out from the previous r/s. If not, no matter what I do also no use. You really need to walked out from it. I know it's hard but you must try. It takes to hands to clap. All you need is time. I believe you can do it. him: (no reply) me: Seriously, are you willing to walked out from it? I know action speaks louder than words. him: U think wan den wan? U think wan computer wan delete can delete me: I know can't say want walked out then straight away walked out. it takes time. but if you keep staying on the same spot & don't wanna move on then you won't be able to walked out no matter how long it takes. Let me be the one who bring you out of it hao ma? If you don't try, you won't know. him: (no reply) me: Seriously, I & her is two DIFFERENT matter. She betrayed you but I didn't. It's really unfair to me. If I really want to betray you, I won't agree to be with you in the first place. I know the consquences of betraying you. So don't put the two matters together ok? him: Ppl is different situation same. me: But he's not woo-ing me, situation where the same? him: i jus dunno k. I dun deny tat i being dreamin or havin flashback every night me: I understand how you feels. I have experience that before. But if you tell yourself that you want to forget, you can de. All you need is time & determination. him: (no reply) me: I didn't know that you've been dreaming & having flashback every night. But let's give each other a chance ok? Seriously, I don't want to end our r/s just like that. him: (no reply) me: Can I ask what flashback do you have on every night? him: Abt my x can me: can. Do you still treat me as your girlfriend & do you still have feelings for me? Or all along, I'm just a replacement of her? him: Stop forcin me le la! No mood now bye me: I'm sorry if you think I'm forcing you. But I'm not forcing you, I just want you to face the reality. I know you're feeling terrible & I ain't feeling good too. him: (no more reply) P.S: That's the end of our conversation.
ღ JOLENE LEE ღ
19 June'9o Baby B is my FAVOURITE LOVE ; PERFECT TEN ♥ E-mail
♥ MR PERFECT TEN
Your smile is like the sunshine warming my day.
Your the first and last thing that makes me feel this way.
Your hugs started as a pat on my back, but now I can feel that they’re more then that.
Time will keep ticking, and we will grow old, but your hand in mine will never get cold.
Our love is more then affection.
Our love has the lords protection.
Your love is so strong and bright
it leaves me with a smile when i fall asleep at night,
when im dreaming hours seem as minutes
because i cherish every moment with you in it,
Waking up to your voice “good morning”
sends my heart and soul high a soaring,
love is said to last only till death
but our love will prove stronger than our final breath,
what i am saying is i love you for heavens sake
and when we die our love begins again at heavens gate
